Santa to Mrs. Claus: Why are you giving me an umbrella?
Mrs. Claus: I hear rain, deer!

What do you call an old snowman?
Water!

What does Santa do in his garden?
Hoe, Hoe, Hoe!

What do you have in December that’s not in any other month?
The letter D!

Why is it always cold at Christmas?
Because it’s in Decemberrrrrr!

What kind of candle burns longer, a red candle or a green candle?
Neither, Candles always burn shorter!